Handling holiday stress before it handles you

  • Published
  • By Staff Sgt. Michael Buchanan
  • 71st Medical Operations Squadron Mental Health
VANCE AIR FORCE BASE, Okla. --  It was New Year's Eve. A woman stood up to give the countdown toast at a local club. She requested that everybody stand next to that one person who made their life special during the past year.

The bartender was almost crushed by the crowd.

While there are many mechanisms for handling stress, it is important to ensure that the correct ones are used to deal with the correct stressors.

A carpenter wouldn't use just any tool to build a finely detailed piece of furniture. He would choose the correct tool for the task.

There are many life stressors that can be amplified by the holidays -- finances, travel, family, relationships -- the list goes on.

The key to handling these stressors is communication and preparation.

While finances can be the most intense stress for many, often it is the easiest stressor to alleviate through preparation. One way is by creating a budget and sticking with it. There are financial counselors at the Airman & Family Readiness Center that can help Air Force members and their families come up with a working, realistic financial strategy.

Family can also be a source of stress - both the lack of or too much -- depending on your situation.

Patience is a virtue when dealing with visiting family. A calm answer will always help to diffuse a potentially "catastrophic" situation. Active listening and communication can help reinforce to family members that you appreciate them and care about what they have to say.

Communication is like a game of catch. You can't always have the ball. Listen to what is being said and show you are listening by asking pertinent questions or summarizing what others have said.

Positive reinforcement will make a family member feel good.

While there are those who would pay a million dollars to make their visiting families disappear, there are others who would pay a million dollars to have family close by.

There are Airmen who would trade anything to be with family over the holidays. If you are one of them, it is important not to isolate yourselves. Stay active and plugged in. Find a place to spend the holidays.

Your Air Force family can never replace the people who love you and care about you most. But they can be there for you and give you a hand.

At times, holiday stressors can negatively impact you by impairing sleep, interests, energy, appetite and concentration. It is impossible to predict how a person will individually respond to stress.

Problems in one area lead to problems in another. For example, if stress triggers sleeplessness, this in turn may negatively impact energy and concentration levels. This leads to more stress, creating a downward cycle.

It is important to use the tools you have to manage your stress levels over the holidays. If your tool belt is feeling a little light, stop by Mental Health -- 213-7419, the Chapel -- 213-7211, or any of the other helping agencies on base.

Most important, be aware of each other. It is not just about what your Air Force family can do for you, but also what you can do for your Air Force family.